It’s pretty much impossible for me to have a “lazy Sunday”…In fact, I don’t have lazy days anymore. Today started off like any other. I woke up an hour and a half before my alarm. I burned my hand taking a plate out of the microwave. I got so caught up in the book that I was reading that I was late getting ready for work. I figured that I would still be able to get to work on time if I didn’t blow dry my hair after I showered. On my way out of the house, I looked in the mirror and realized that I had completely forgotten that I just recently dyed my hair purple. The purple dye in my hair stained my white work shirt. I quickly changed shirts and towel dried my hair the best that I could. I drove to work with my windows down to try to air-dry my hair, but my hair stained the shirt that I had just put on. At work I pulled my hair to the side and realized that after my shower I had forgot to put my gauges back in. I Spent my entire shift trying to hide the stains on my shirt, and also trying to hide my ears. About 30 mins before the end of my 8 hour shift, my manager asked me to stay an hour late. Right before the end of my nine hour shift, it started to rain. I had to walk through the rain, which got my hair wet and my hair stained my shirt some more.
I know that it could have been a lot worse, but I just wanted to share with everyone who wanted to laugh at my misfortune. Happy Sunday.
I used to live my life in verses.
I had rhymes for it all.
I had poems for when I was happy and poems for when my life was at a crawl.
Now it feels my brain’s collapsed.
The creativity is gone.
Such a dull and desolate place.
Where have all the poems gone?
I find myself saying a lot of mean things about people that have hurt me in the past. Which for most people is absolutely normal. What inspired me to write this wasn’t the things these people did to hurt me or even the mean things that I’ve said about them in exchange. What inspired me to write this is that no matter what a person has done to hurt me or the things that I’ve said about them, I would 100% be there if they called me right now and said that they needed me.
This in turn made me think about what the driving factors were in breaking off some of the relationships that I’ve had. Every relationship that has ended was due to that fact that I felt like the other person wasn’t doing enough to benefit the relationship. Among other reasons, they lied, cheated, and ditched their way out of our relationship and I had to cut the ties to preserve my sanity. So why do I still drive myself crazy by thinking about them? Why do I feel the unquenchable need to bash them in conversations with my close friends?
Because I care too much.
Despite everything that they’ve done or what I’ve said…I still care.
I don’t care how our relationship ended, if you called me at 3 A.M. because you had thoughts about ending it all, I’d be on the phone with you until those thoughts were at bay. If you were stuck somewhere that you didn’t feel safe, I would be there to pick you up and drive you somewhere safe. If you just need someone to talk to, I’m here.
I still care and I’m here whenever you need me.