I find myself saying a lot of mean things about people that have hurt me in the past. Which for most people is absolutely normal. What inspired me to write this wasn’t the things these people did to hurt me or even the mean things that I’ve said about them in exchange. What inspired me to write this is that no matter what a person has done to hurt me or the things that I’ve said about them, I would 100% be there if they called me right now and said that they needed me.
This in turn made me think about what the driving factors were in breaking off some of the relationships that I’ve had. Every relationship that has ended was due to that fact that I felt like the other person wasn’t doing enough to benefit the relationship. Among other reasons, they lied, cheated, and ditched their way out of our relationship and I had to cut the ties to preserve my sanity. So why do I still drive myself crazy by thinking about them? Why do I feel the unquenchable need to bash them in conversations with my close friends?
Because I care too much.
Despite everything that they’ve done or what I’ve said…I still care.
I don’t care how our relationship ended, if you called me at 3 A.M. because you had thoughts about ending it all, I’d be on the phone with you until those thoughts were at bay. If you were stuck somewhere that you didn’t feel safe, I would be there to pick you up and drive you somewhere safe. If you just need someone to talk to, I’m here.
I still care and I’m here whenever you need me.