I’ve always been one to watch where I step. Shoot, I even carry band-aids in my wallet in case of emergency. I’m mostly careful about what I say around people that I know. In most cases, I say very little to people that I don’t know. So why now am I questioning what’s safe and what’s good for me?
It’s true that I have been prioritizing safety over happiness. Looking back now, I should have jumped at opportunities instead of hesitating so much. I am the one holding myself back, all because I am so damn afraid of the unexpected. I don’t like not having a plan and I don’t like the feeling that things are crumbling.
I am drowning in a pool of stagnant water and I keep taking for granted the people who keep trying to throw me lifelines. I am safe here in this pool and I don’t know what will happen if I get out. I’m exhausted from thinking so hard about this and I wish that I could just make up my mind.